Have You Seen This? Eagle Mountain mom goes in for colonoscopy, comes out as Santa

EAGLE MOUNTAIN — When Holly Robinson went in for a routine colonoscopy, she came out with far more than she had expected: She was Santa.

“I think this is how it happens. You have a … colonoscopy and then you become Santa. That’s how it happened for me,” she said in a video that is part of a three-part series captured by her husband.

Call it an anesthesia-induced fever dream all you want, but after watching the video, I’m convinced she has indeed replaced the white-bearded jolly man.

“What do you want for Christmas? I’m Santa … so send me your lists,” Robinson said in the video. “… I think Santa has unlimited money, so I might be OK now. I can do a bunch of shopping if I have a lot of money. It was bestowed upon me.”

Robinson didn’t just assume the role of Santa; her kids were now elves, and her husband was “Mr. Claus.”

“What are we gonna do with our car, though?” Robinson asked her husband. “You might not be invited in the sleigh. … What would they call the non-male Santa? … You’re Mr. Claus … he does have a name! … Our kids are elves now … they’re not gonna like that. They’re gonna have to quit their jobs and make toys full-time now.”

After watching Robinson’s transformative experience, I’m just glad it wasn’t me.

With my Christmas luck, I would have woken up as Santa, and then my sleigh would have broken down mere days outside the warranty expiration. The elves would all be sick, and all my reindeer would have broken harnesses due to my failure to maintain the simplest of systems. I would then have to Uber my way around the world, dropping off millions of IOUs and apology notes, and Christmas would be effectively ruined.

Yeah, Robinson is a much better fit for Santa. And all jokes aside, the Christmas miracle is that Robinson’s checkup was all clear.

“I had no polyps because why would Santa have polyps? Which means I can eat eggnog and sugar!”