Expert: Talk to your kids after a traumatic event like a school shooting

Dec 1, 2021, 3:56 PM

students respond to traumatic event after school shooting by tying ribbons around trees...

Freshmen Rory Metzger, left, and Zachary Majewski place bows on trees outside Oxford High School in Oxford, Mich., Wednesday, Dec. 1, 2021. Authorities say a 15-year-old sophomore opened fire at Oxford High School, killing four students and wounding seven other people on Tuesday. (AP Photo/Paul Sancya)

(AP Photo/Paul Sancya)

SALT LAKE CITY — For a child experiencing a traumatic event, the best thing a parent can do is talk to their kid, said a psychiatrist.

Another school shooting, this time at Oxford High School in Michigan, left four teens dead and eight other people wounded. A 15-year-old boy is being charged as an adult in the shooting, Oakland County Prosecutor Karen McDonald announced at a news conference as reported by CNN.

An Oakland County sheriff’s deputy came to a barricaded door on Tuesday with students hiding inside.

“Sheriff’s office, it’s safe to come out.”

“Come to the door and look at my badge, bro,” said the deputy.

“He said ‘bro.’ Red flag!” a student said.

The TikTok video below shows the confusion inside the classroom as students escape out a window.

@shwifty766

All prayers out for Oxford high school and to all my classmates #prayers #prayersneeded #oxfordhighschool #fyp #fypシ #capcut

♬ original sound – ItsShwifty

Trauma expert weighs in on how to respond after a school shooting

Dr. Hans Watson, psychiatrist, trauma expert and founder of University Elite, often comes in after school shootings to help teachers and counselors work with students. That includes the 2018 shooting that left 17 dead at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida.

Watson joined KSL NewsRadio’s Dave & Dujanovic Wednesday to share his knowledge about school shootings.

Students perceived threat on other side of door

Watson said the students and the deputy did nothing wrong in that tense situation; they just had too little information to work with. He said the teens reacted to what they perceived as a threat on the other side of the door and so they fled.

“When I was working with the students who had been in the Marjory Stoneman shooting down in Florida, one of the students there actually told me, ‘I trusted the police officer because they started speaking in a way that I felt like they were one of us,'” Watson said.

But in the Michigan shooting, the opposite was true. The students escaped what they perceived as a possible threat.

“‘I don’t know what’s going on, but ‘bro’ doesn’t feel right,'” Watson said. “‘I’m going to take some action to get away,’ which is smart.”

Talk about a traumatic event with your kids

What can parents do to help their kids cope with any fear? Co-host Debbie Dujanovic asked.

“The number one thing a parent can do to help their children is talk about it,” Watson said.

When parents are silent about a traumatic experience, it unconsciously sends a message to their children that “This is so dangerous, we are not allowed to even speak about it.”

“Unwittingly, we’re actually making things worse by not talking about it,” Watson said.

When the trauma is discussed between parents and children it sends a message that this situation is manageable because my mom and dad are talking about it.

As a parent, co-host Dave Noriega said if he can’t talk about upsetting events like school shootings with his children, he cannot know what their thoughts and feeling are about it, and move forward.

Dave & Dujanovic can be heard on weekdays from 9 a.m. to noon. on KSL NewsRadio. Users can find the show on the KSL NewsRadio website and app, as well as Apple Podcasts and Google Play. 

We want to hear from you.

Have a story idea or tip? Send it to the KSL NewsRadio team here.

Flood waters surround homes in Beaver, Utah, on Monday, July 20, 2026. Residents have been under a ...

Becky Bruce

Beaver City boil water order partially lifted

Some residents of Beaver City are no longer under a boil water order, though they still should take precautions before drinking or using the water.

2 days ago

The KSL forecast for Saturday, July 25, 2026, shows highs above 75 degrees every day for a week, as...

Becky Bruce

Heat advisory in effect through Monday night for northern Utah

The National Weather Service issued a heat advisory for multiple days, saying the lows at night would not offer much relief from triple-digit daytime highs.

2 days ago

FILE: A sign is posted in front of the 23andMe headquarters on February 01, 2024 in Sunnyvale, Cali...

Logan Stefanich, KSL

Utah, 40 other states reach $18M settlement with 23andMe after data breach, bankruptcy

Utah and over 40 other states on Wednesday announced a $18 million settlement agreement with genetic information company 23andMe after the company filed for bankruptcy in March 2025.

3 days ago

Sen John Curtis, R-Utah, walks through the Capitol during votes in Washington, July 16. A journey t...

Cami Mondeaux, Deseret News

From Salt Lake City to the Senate: Curtis leads tribute honoring Pioneer Day

In the US Senate on Thursday, Sen. John Curtis led a resolution honoring the Utah pioneers for exhibiting a spirit that he says still shapes the country today.

3 days ago

Mateus Rangel, of Provo, plays hymns with his children. He spoke about how he uses songs for "Hymns...

Emily Ashcraft, KSL

Church of Jesus Christ announces 10 hymns to be included in ‘Hymns for Home and Church’

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints released 10 new hymns that will be included in its new hymnbook on Thursday as part of a phased rollout of "Hymns for Home and Church."

3 days ago

Taylor Farms Mexico's facilities in Doctor Mora, Guanajuato state, Mexico, Monday. The facility was...

Siddhi Mahatole, Reuters

Taylor Farms temporarily shuts Mexico facility as US cyclosporiasis cases rise, source says

Taylor Farms on Thursday temporarily closed its Mexico facility linked to cyclosporiasis cases. The CDC has reported 4,173 cases across 41 states.

3 days ago

Sponsored Articles

...

Bear Lake

Road trip ready: How Bear Lake became the go-to destination for Western U.S. travelers

Whether you are chasing pristine beaches, fresh raspberry shakes, or endless water sports, this sponsored guide—brought to you in partnership with Bear Lake —uncovers everything you need to plan the ultimate getaway.   There’s nothing quite like the thrill of hopping in the car with your favorite snacks in tow and heading out for a […]

...

Harper Clinic

A new standard of care: How Harper Clinic’s IOP is changing the face of mental health treatment in Utah

This article is sponsored by Harper Clinic, a Utah-based clinic offering FDA-approved TMS therapy for treatment-resistant depression.    Utah’s mental health crisis is leaving many residents caught in an uncomfortable middle ground: struggling too much for weekly therapy alone, but unable to step away from work, parenting or daily life for inpatient treatment. As demand […]

...

Harper Clinic

Breaking free from depression: How Harper Clinic’s TMS Therapy can help

This article is sponsored by Harper Clinic, a Utah-based clinic offering FDA-approved TMS therapy for treatment-resistant depression.    The weight of depression is real. Many people spend years fighting it, adjusting medications, managing side effects and wondering if this is simply how life is going to feel.   According to the World Health Organization, depression affects […]

mental health...

Andrew Adams, KSL

Library discussions bring men’s mental health to the surface

Therapists say it’s common for men to repress things like trauma, grief, stress and anxiety. Now, a new weekly series of discussions aims to help men bring it all to the surface.

...

Bear Lake Convention & Visitors Bureau

Cozy up in Bear Lake: Discover the magic of a winter getaway

SALT LAKE CITY – The holiday season shines brightest when time slows down and loved ones gather. Gifts, decorations and festive music come and go, but shared experiences tend to last much longer. Research supports that idea. Dr. Theresa E. DiDonato told Psychology Today that vacations can strengthen relationships by creating meaningful time away from daily […]

...

Harper Clinic

Rewriting the path to healing: Inside Harper Clinic’s whole-person mental health model

OREM — A few decades ago, you’d have had a hard time finding a doctor to treat both your mind and body; And a century ago, you’d have been hard-pressed to find a doctor to treat your mind at all. Today, medical professionals are understanding more and more the undeniable connection between the body and […]

Expert: Talk to your kids after a traumatic event like a school shooting