Jeff Caplan’s Minute of News: Utah’s #1 Halloween Candy? Shocker!
Oct 23, 2024, 7:00 AM
Halloween candy.
Editor’s note: This is an editorial piece. An editorial, like a news article, is based on fact but also shares opinions. The opinions expressed here are solely those of the author and are not associated with our newsroom.
SALT LAKE CITY — Once again, Instacart has peeked into our candy buying habits. The supermarket delivery service has looked at sales data, and once again Utah is … different.
From coast to coast across America, the number one Halloween candy is Reese’s Cups. The breakdown by state looks nothing like the blue and red election map. The candy map is a landslide. 42 states vote for running mates Peanut Butter and Chocolate. Reese’s Cups won by an overwhelming margin.
EXCEPT for the Mountain West.
Instacart data shows that five states like Montana spend more on M&M’s: a slightly inferior but perfectly acceptable choice.
But there are three states, Idaho, Hawaii, and Utah, where the number one Halloween candy by actual sales… is the Peanut version?
My Utahn-for-life wife eats these Peanut M&M’s. She always offers me a handful just so she can watch me gag.
Lemme explain.
The sanctity of the M&M marriage between hardened shell and cheap chocolate flavor burst hiding inside is violated by the presence of that dang peanut.
It’s like a piece of gravel in the middle of a birthday cake. Like a bone in your chicken sandwich. It’s like your kids knocking on the door late at night soon as you put on the love songs playlist. You understand what I’m saying. The peanut messes up everything. The intrusion of a barely edible rock into a perfectly good M&M is blasphemous and wrong.
But hey. If you think kids want that more than Reese’s Cups. It’s a free country. And speaking of which… please do not give my grandkids Donald Trump Chocolate Bars. Or Kamala Harris Chocolate Bars. They’re both made by Astor Chocolates, 4-bucks a bar, but if you’re so inclined… don’t do it.
For the love of all things holy, please do not confuse Halloween and Election Day.
Jeff Caplan is the host of Jeff Caplan’s Afternoon News on KSL NewsRadio. Follow him on Facebook and X.
Other Minutes of News:
-
Jeff Caplan’s Minute of News: Murder in the Wilderness…
-
Jeff Caplan’s Minute of News: Sabrina Carpenter could put the Mayor of NYC in federal prison
