Jeff Caplan’s Minute of News: Salt Lake’s airport is number one… at something

Editor’s note: This is an editorial piece. An editorial, like a news article, is based on fact but also shares opinions. The opinions expressed here are solely those of the author and are not associated with our newsroom.

SALT LAKE CITY — Turns out our gorgeous new airport, Salt Lake City International Airport, is number one in America for on-time performance.  

So what makes us so good? For one — we are masters of snow removal. No sooner does the first flake hit than the men in the massive snowplows get to work clearing a path for planes that have been doused in de-icing solution. 

Also putting us on top — the airport’s new and has the best technology. Snazzy new computers.

But that’s not enough to make you the best. As we all know, a deluge in Dallas or a Noreaster in New York can cause a cascading effect that would trickle down to Salt Lake like a leak in the Tunnel between Concourse A and B — which happened recently.

That longest mile between points A and B became Salt Lake’s newest lake for a day. You didn’t need a kayak to get to your gate… but time-challenged travelers traversed the troublesome tunnel and the planes left on time for California, for Kansas City, for Katmandu.

They’ve yet to figure out a permanent fix to the water seeping upward from an underground lake. After all, the Great Salt Lake is practically next door. But for now, a little duct tape and a temporary fix are just enough to keep travelers moving — on time — to Calgary, Corpus Christi or your connection to Katmandu.

At our top-rated airport, every voyage begins with the first step. And then a couple thousand more as you lug your possessions six-tenths of a mile getting your steps and getting to your gate. A sojourn so long one person suggested a unique Utahnian announcement at baggage claim.

“Please leave your handcart at the end of your journey.”

So, Pioneers, we’re number one. But I can’t say no sweat, because you do — getting to your gate.

Jeff Caplan is the host of Jeff Caplan’s Afternoon News on KSL NewsRadio. Follow him on Facebook and X. 

Editor’s note: After the publication of this story, the Salt Lake City International Airport confirmed to KSL NewsRadio that it has installed a sump pump to help manage water seeping upward from the underground lake.

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